Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
