Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
