bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
