so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
