Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize
