he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
