Screwed.edu
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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