Dual....:-)
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Randomize
