i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Randomize
