Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
