I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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