is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize