Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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