Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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