tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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