shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
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