This girl is more easily done than said...
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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