I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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