My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize