thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
