And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
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