why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Randomize
