yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
