I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize