i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
