There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
