so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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