My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
