Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
