i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
