Barsexuality is the new black.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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