So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
