I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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