True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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