So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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