i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
