i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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