i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
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