More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
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I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books