woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
