Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Is it because I queefed?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
