Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
