Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
