You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
you will always have a special place in my vag
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize