Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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