for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
