what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
