what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
