good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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