I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Randomize
