I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
This is my gift to your gina
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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