Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
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